I'm getting really excited about the Tonies, guys.

[shaeberry]

So... I'm gonna sort of blog, in a way.

Seriously, though, I'm getting so dorky excited, mostly because I've seen a hell of a lot of the shows this year, which is new, and there is a Rent anniversary performance, which I am undoubtedly going to laugh at a lot. But Dee will be there! And I am rooting for Patti so hardcore for Best Actress, you don't even know.



LION KING. I actually started bawling during this song when I saw this show. It was a little lame, but, oh well.

That was the greatest opening ever.

I maintain that Julie Taymor is a genius.

EDIT #1:

Well, that was epic.

And I missed MLP!!! How?!?!

Dan Radcliffe, what the hell are you doing here? No one invited you, goddamn.

Shit, there is going to be SO MUCH AWESOME TONIGHT. I can't even stand it. I am already in love with this Tonies.

EDIT #2

Laurence Fishburne!!! Maybe Gina Torres is there!!

Best Supporting Actress- Play
NOOOOOOOOOO. MARTHA PLIMPTON. SHE WAS UNBELIEVABLE. At least it went to Rondi Reed, who was absolutely fabulous.

...She looks like my 8th grade science teacher.

Cry-Baby performance:
John Waters is kind of... it's rape o'clock.

Hmmm, I don't know. Nice dancing, but I'm not a fan, really. And I have no idea what is going on. What the hell is on their feet?

Mel Says: Those are some stylish prison uniforms.

EDIT #3

Laura Linney! She is just the cutest of cute.

Best Supporting Actor- Play

Um, well, really. If Raul doesn't win, I will...

SHIT. WHAT IS WITH RAUL GETTING GYPPED EVERY SINGLE TIME. MY GOD. SERIOUSLY?!?! SO ANGRY. I DON'T LIKE YOU, TONY AWARDS.

Passing Strange performance:
I think I kinda dig... but I kind of don't understand what is going on...

Next is GYPSY and RENT. That is CRAZY.

EDIT #4

All My Sons is coming back! Yes!

Best Direction- Musical
I really had no preference. All were great. Bartlett Sher wins for South Pacific and is kind of boring.

Gypsy performance:

I am so dying right now.

Okay, I just sat stunned in silence while Patti blew me away with her talent.

And then there was Phantom, which I was angered by (sorry, Kirryn!) until it was a parody with Whoopi, which was kind of hysterical.

Mel Says: That's Mandy Patinkin?! I thought it was just a homeless man they invited in to watch!

EDIT #5
The year in plays...

I saw most of those! Aww, look, it's Duncan Sheik! He is such a cute little dork.

Best Score
In The Heights!! Yay!! I so want to see this, actually. Hahaha, everyone is freaking out.

HE IS RAPPING. I LOVE HIM.

Ew, it's Harry Connick, Jr. , aka, "Buttface."

South Pacific performance:
Hmmm. It's good, but I'm still not convinced it's as good as Gypsy or Sunday.

Daniel Radcliffe looks so bored... Go home, Daniel.

Edit #6
Gina Torres has been spotted! She is present!

Best Supporting Actress- Musical

Cheno! Looks so classy!

Mel Says: Ha! I love how they're playing "Popular", good job there!

Aww, Cheno, you are SO dorky. And giggly. And hilarious.

LAURA!!! LAURA!!! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!! YOUR DRESS IS AMAZING!! YOU ARE SO WONDERFUL!! AND ADORABLE AND NERVOUS AND GEEKY AND YOU ARE SO CUTE I DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MYSELF!

Grease performance:
I cannot take this seriously, because I can't stop thinking about Ziskin taking Maddie and Lane to see "GREASEONBROADWAY!" as they put it, and he did. Also, I hate this show. A lot. The only okay part of it is Rizzo.

Mel Says: I know! It's so ridiculous! It's just a bunch of people combing their hair! And what is the moral? If you wear tight slutty leather you will get the guy! Change for your men, girls, you know you want to! Doooooo iiitttt!!

EDIT #7
I love Brooke Shields, but I am not a fan of that dress.

Best Supporting Actor- Musical

BOYYYYD!!! You are so fabulous!! And like, the happiest man in the world! I just love you so much!

Mel Says: Goddamn, Arthur Laurents is going to die, like, tonight! (and then about Boyd) Aww, what a spazz!

Little Mermaid performance, what the shit:

This is so retarded and bad, I cannot deal. Get of the goddamn rollerskates.

A Catered Affair performance:

This looks boring. Okay, that was boring. And not good singing.

Young Frankenstein performance:

Whoa, Megan Mullaly's boob was about ready to COME OUT. Eh, not a fan.

Mel Says: Okay, we get it, you like his penis! God!

Hahahah, oh look, now it's Kate Walsh's UNNECESSARILY SEXUAL car ad. Goddamn.

Mel Says: Hahah, you know what's soon, Shae, Rent is soon!

EDIT #8
Aww, it's my Kerry Butler!

OH SHIT IT IS RENT TIME.

Time for me and Mel to regress!

Well, actually, nevermind, it is actually scenic design. Or best play. Whichever.

Actually, it's...

Best Direction- Play
AUGUST: OSAGE! YEAH! That show seriously is unbelievable.

Spamalot, what the hell. Oh, it's another one of those weird things. God.

Mel Says: Is it AIDS o'clock, yet?

EDIT #9

Mary-Louise!! I love you! Hahah, she just, like, doesn't care.

Best Actor- Play
Who the hell is this guy? He's from Boeing-Boeing... I don't know what the hell is going on right not, seriously. The whole audience is like, What the fuck?

ACTORS are SO WEIRD, GUYS. I seriously, don't know what just happened.

Ahaha, Alec Baldwin.

Mel Says: He has gotten so fat oh man.

Best Actress- Play

I AM SO CONFLICTED about this DAMN CATEGORY I LITERALLY DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MYSELF.

DEANNA DUNNIGAN! I kind of secretly wanted Eve Best to win hardcore, but that was never going to happen, so. Man, I love her. I think I love her more in the show, though, whereas Eve Best is awesome at everything she does. Amy Morton also rocks, dude.

Ew, I hate it when they start to play people off.

In The Heights performance:
Oh man, I want to see this show so badly. This looks like the greatest thing ever.

FRODO HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

As Mel Says, this is pretty much the Latin Rent. SO COOL. I dig rapping. And this dancing is TIGHT. Okay, Mel and I are seeing it.

EDI #10

HAHAHAHAHA, DAN RADCLIFFE. This is the funniest shit ever.

And now it's Best Play.

Best Play
August! Man, I wanted you to win so bad! So excited! That may be one of the best shows I've ever seen.

I love you so much, Tracy Letts. Damn, that is a large crowd. I think the whole cast is up there!

MANDYYYYYYY. God, he really does look like a homeless man.

Dude, where is Sondheim! I wanted him to be there so bad to accept his award! Is he being a sociopath or something?

Mel Says: Hahah, he's probably at home eating popcorn and laughing.

OH, IT'S the SUNDAY performance now!

Man, that brought me back... I kind of wished they'd picked a different song, though.

HAHAHA, Moritz Whoopi. That was pretty great.

EDIT #11

Best Revival- Musical
South Pacific? Really? Are we kidding, here? Gypsy and Sunday were so much hotter, man.

Xanadu performance! Will Testa be in it? I love Testa!

Dude, did Lily Tomlin just spoil the Tonies?!?!

Hahahaha, I love Kerry! She is skating around with one skate!

Mel Says: This is the gayest thing I have ever seen in my life.

TESTA. TESTA ON THE LEFT. That's Mr. Ziskin's friend, guys! I love her!

EDIT #12

EVERYONE KNOWS IT IS AIDS O'CLOCK.
Yes. Yes. Yes.

Whoa. I have no idea what is going on right now. They just cut like ALL of La Vie Boheme!

YES, the original cast is actually here! We were afraid they weren't going to come.
FREDI IT IS FREDI OH MY GOD. And Daphne actually looks kind of normal! Is something wrong with Wilson? He looks like he's dying!

DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

Where is Jesse L. Martin? Where is he?

HAHAHA PATTI IS CLAPPING AND I JUST PEED MYSELF. HAHAHAH GEORGES SEURAT IS SINGING.

Dude, they love each other so much, man.

Mel Says: So, apparently, Jesse has ascended into heaven again, where he belongs.

I have to laugh, too because Mel and I were like, "What if the rest of the cast, like, didn't feel like showing up, and it's just Anthony." And then it was just Anthony for a bit, and we died.

Oh, Liza.

Best Actor- Musical
Oh, god, South Pacific, AGAIN. What is this? I think every time Kellie O'Hara is in a classic musical the Tonies wind up being all wonky.

Aw, man. David Hyde Pierce.

BEST ACTRESS- MUSICAL

SHIT SHIT SHIT. I AM SHAKING.

Me: Hahaha, everyone knows she should win.
Mel Says: She's like, "Shyeah. Sorry, I can't hear you over the sounds of how awesome I am."

PATTI PATTI PATTI PATTI PATTI PATTI PATTI PATTI PATTI. FUCK. YES.

Patti, I love you so hardcore. Oh my god. Dude, she just pulled out TWO PAGES. Oh man, this will be awhile. She deserves it, man. Dude, they are NOT playing her off. Shut the hell up.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. PATTI I LOVE YOU.

EDIT #13

Best Musical!
IN THE HEIGHTS! YES! They are all SO geeky and adorable.

Oh, wow, that producer looks quite a bit like Anne Coulter.

Everyone is so happy! HAHAHA, I love HIM! He is on someone's shoulders!

Okay, and that is the end.

This was fun.



Aww, that was enjoyable. A good Tony Awards, I would say.

Comments

[pocky_slash.livejournal.com]

Mel Says: That's Mandy Patinkin?! I thought it was just a homeless man they invited in to watch!

AHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA. harmonyangel totally said that in our Tonys chat!

[pocky_slash.livejournal.com]

Mel Says: Is it AIDS o'clock, yet?

laskjfiowejflk I love you guys.

[amcb13.livejournal.com]

So, I think I did not win my office Tony pool, having only predicted 12 out of 26. But I was pretty pleased about Patti--and I don't know if you know this but she's not always been my favorite, mostly because she scares me. In this role, though, like...win. And she did. And when the orchestra came at the end of her speech I was immediately struck by the realization--and I wonder if the Tony producers were too--that *there was nothing they could do* to make Patti stop talking before she was ready. Like, usually the last resort is cutting the mic--but it's PATTI, so she could just talk right over the orchestra! They would have had to use one of those big hooks!

Also, I am afraid that Passing Strange may not make it to the fall, but if you can see it, you should, because it is SO SO SO amazing.

And Mark Rylance...wtf. But I'm seeing his show on Tuesday--which means, Bradley Whitford, here I come, holycrap.

[theratmanknows.livejournal.com]

Every time they showed Bradley Whitford (who looked surly and angry, cheer up Braddy), I squeaked a little.

[theratmanknows.livejournal.com]

I just got home from my Tony's party, I'll respond more to your Tony's blog in full when I actually read it, but I just have to say PATTI LUPONE FUCKING YES SHE IS CRAZY BUT I LOVE HER. Also, I was in a room with like, eight theatre kids, and the amount of ridiculous opinions that came out every four seconds are really similar to your blog. But less funny. But with more comments about the mysterious location Steven Sondheim. (hovering above the crowd? Directing the entire show/world? Off boning beautiful bronzed beach boys in the Caribbean? WHO KNOWS.) Jesus God I love that man.

My friend Shea, who is a hippie actress (sound familiar?) and I saw In The Heights together and have been having a really hard time processing it together, because the storyline is really stupid, but the production is so FIERCE. Of course, if I had $1.5 million lying around, I could make lyrics like "YOU'VE HAD ENOUGH" "SAYS THE GIRL WHO HAS IT ALL" "I THOUGHT YOU WERE DIFFERENT" seem acceptable. Good thing Lin-Manuel is so FREAKING CUTE, otherwise I wouldn't be able to forgive how ridiculously formulaic this year's Best Musical was.

Longest. Unnecessary. Comment. Ever.

[theratmanknows.livejournal.com]

Okay, now I think I’m actually going to respond to your blog, because I had a lot of thoughts. And because I want to. Leave me alone. (I missed the first hour and a half, but it’s cool.)

I’m sad I missed the Crybaby scene. Have you ever seen the movie? I watched it at like, three in the morning in an apartment in New York and thought I hallucinated it, because it was so fucking ridiculous.

Ummm, I don’t mean to sound creepy, but when I saw Company last summer, all I could think about was having sex with Raúl Esparza. More specifically, making him sing “Being Alive” to me at various hours of the night. Actually, we could skip the sex part and he could just sing to me and it would have the same outcome. Sweet Jebus I love that man.

The Passing Strange part is when I showed up. It was really fucking weird.

Thoughts on Gypsy: I love Patti; there is a reason you are supposed to see plays from an audience and not close up. Please stop zooming in on her face. Her mouth is frightening.

Why was Whoopi even there? She hasn’t actually had a career in what, eighty-three years? Since Sister Act II, I believe.

I played the In the Heights OBCR constantly for about two straight weeks after it first came out. The lyrics are really pretty horrible, mostly. Pretty much just sung conversations. But the arrangements are great, and the rapping is sweet, and THE PART WHERE HE THANKED HIS REAL-LIFE LOVE VANESSA WHO IS HIS CHARACTER’S LOVE INTEREST IN THE PLAY WAS SO CUTE HE IS SO CUTE HOLY GOODNESS. Also, the guy with the funny afro who was laughing too hard was the MusicGod of the entire show. And I met him and didn’t realize it. I went down to the pit and talked to him about the fact that he went to Berklee? But I thought he was just the conductor, I didn’t realize he had done all the arrangements, which are really quite interesting because they’re so Latin-influenced, annnd I suck.

DANIEL RADCLIFFE IS SO AWKWARD IN REAL LIFE HOLY BAJEEZUS. However, we voted that he should win the award for Best Penis On A Broadway Stage.

Kristin Chenowith has clearly been working on her talking voice, because it usually makes me hurt. It was much less grating tonight. I liked her armpit swipe. Maybe I’ll like her more on Pushing Daisies now that she doesn’t talk like a cheesegrater on a chalkboard.

Was Laura the absurdly gorgeous one who pounded herself on the chest and waved seventeen times? Because she was BEAUTIFUL and everyone in the room died a little.

My school did Grease this year, and a few members of the cast were freaking out a little the whole time. I do like boys in leather, though, gotta say.

“I love Brooke Shields, but I am not a fan of that dress.”
By “dress,” do you mean glittering pantsuit?
Also, she looked like Lindsay Lohan. Ohhh, Brooke Shields, you are so not comfortable with your age.

All my friends were rooting for deJesus, but he really doesn’t do much except for be funny on occasion. He’s not a huge part though, so I don’t know why he would have won.

Arthur Laurents: oldest man alive.

Little Mermaid should have won best choreography; those hand-motions were the SHIT. And HOW DOES SHE MAKE HER TAIL MOVE? Towards the end, it was quivering and seizing. Awkward.

Hahaha, when Mary-Louise came out, I talked about you and your love for her. Because I love you. Too bad she was terribly boring.

HAHAHAH THE BOEING-BOEING GUY WHAT THE FUCK WAS HE SAYING?! The entire audience was just like, stunned. I LOVE ACTORS HAHAHA.

The dancing in In the Heights is PHENOMENAL HOLY GOD. And the boys are so cute. It tears me apart, because it’s SO DUMB. It’s like, CONFLICTED SMART GIRL. STERN-BUT-LOVING PARENTS. GOSSIPY HAIRDRESSERS. NARRATOR WHO NEVER GETS THE GIRL THEN MAGICALLY ACTUALLY DOES. But then there are FIREWORKS.



TO BE CONTINUED.

Re: Longest. Unnecessary. Comment. Ever.

[shaeberry.livejournal.com]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jg2C-Kn5YKo

That was Laura, um, I think it's the one you're referring to. In which case, she is my FAVORITE EVER you don't even know. Best part? "Oh look there is Arthur he is standing hi Arthur!!"

She was so geeky and I have a feeling if I ever win a Tony it will be the same deal.

Re: Longest. Unnecessary. Comment. Ever.

[theratmanknows.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I loved her! She was so spazzy.

[theratmanknows.livejournal.com]

PART II

Steven Sondheim is so emotionally honest he is perfect I love you Steven Sondheim, did I ever tell you that when my mom lived in the Village, her bridge partner was Sondheim’s lover?

WHAT THE FUCK IS XANADU. ROLLER BLADES + GREEK GODDESSES + MUHFUGGIN PEGASUS + SHORT DENIM SHORTS THAT REVEALED WAYYY TO MUCH THIGH/BULGE = WHATTTTTT

No, Daphne is insane. Always. She was in the Sex and the City movie, incidentally.

Idina Menzel makes me so happy because she a) has a huge nose and b) has a weird jaw slide thing and I have BOTH THOSE THINGS and I’m always afraid that I will never be a successful actress as a result but CLEARLY I CAN BE. Except she’s also ridiculously hot and fucks Taye Diggs on a routine basis, which are character traits I do not possess. (What if regular sex with Taye Diggs was an acquired character trait?)

I second the Patti-clapping love. She was so self-conscious! She looked a little like Liza Minnelli! Speaking of Liza Minnelli…

Does David Hyde Pierce have cancer or something? He looked on the verge of death.

DUH Patti was going to win, was she going to lose to XANADUWOMAN? Patti, you crazy. DID SHE FORGET TO THANK STEVEN?

Oh man, when Lin-Manuel was on there shoulders and he just looked TERRIFIED and SHOCKED and SO CONFUSED and his eyes were SO ROUND and he is SO CUTE OH MY GOODNESS.

There were really very few surprises tonight. Except for how much South Pacific won, because, like, hi, Gypsy? I haven’t seen any of the plays, though, so I had no opinions on that.



WHEE IT FELT GOOD TO GET THAT OUT thanks for letting me take up your comments page.

love, anya